okay new beginning gonna move on
it's still healing but thx god, it's healing
thxs to Great Miss Tee
her therapy works
yea i just love the way she talk to me
it's like she totally understand
yea she really understand
now i can only pray for u
lols
play punk on gerlyn did noe angel was in the conference,
they tot i gonna jump, yea i gotta jump on with my life
it just started .. MOVE ON CLEON!!!
realize finally that so many ppl actually care for me
THx Thx thx
ok look straight cleon theres more to come
btw i still nid a doctor/angel to heal this tattered heart of mine

i <3 you so-

it's just too fast to realise that u're no longer mine
that you're now in other ppl's arm
that my love no longer reach u
that everything change since the day u left
that i no longer have interest in what ever i do
that i use to be so selfish
that we never really got to end well
that our promises no longer exist
that the taste of love suck so bad
that i am really hurt this time
that i dunno how to pick my self up again
that really no one can ever replace u
that all i only need is u
that living w/o u is so meaningless
that theres no more motivation in life
that we'll never be tgt again
that the truth is u left
that theres no return
that theres nth tat will numb this pain
that my heart is bleeding each time when ever i think of u
that it really is bleeding everysec everymin
that i nolonger the person to support u
tat i'm no longer ther person who u trust
that no matter wad i do now is pointless
no matter wad i sae will never change
that time really wont stop and wait
neither will it rewind back to the past




that we are over




that you're gone



妳的回話凌亂著　在這個時刻

我想起噴泉旁的白鴿　甜蜜散落了

情緒莫名的拉扯　我還愛妳呢

而妳斷斷續續唱著歌　假裝沒事了

時間過了　走了　愛情面臨選擇

妳冷了　倦了　我哭了

怎麼了　妳累了　說好的　幸福呢

我懂得　不說了　愛淡了　夢遠了

開心與不開心　一一細數著　妳再不捨

那些愛過的感覺都太深刻　我都還記得

妳不等了　說好的　幸福呢

我錯了　淚乾了　放手了　後悔了

只是回憶的音樂盒還旋轉著　要怎麼停呢

i <3 you so-

i noe waD u have done, go on ahead...

i noe u just didt want tell me..

i <3 you so-

it's not i dun wan to move on,
but my heart like an open wound,
and every time i think
it's like stabbing it again and again
i could really feel the blood flowing and leaking away
please just reach out to me
fuck just wanna get wasted
.. fuck i'm wasted

i <3 you so-

haiz..
why must this happen
when i tot we could last
when couldn't we..
and now
both have to suffer,
it's so hurting
it hurt even more,
when i watch u suffer so much from it...
how did we end up this way,
i'm sorry for causing u so much so much
been thinking and thinking
i dont noe wad to do
but i know i just want to feel and care for u again
we dont talk no more,
it feel so lonely and fuckup
sometimes i really dunno wad u want,
baby i'm sorry i'm such a useless jerk
how did we end up this way
perhaps it's my ignorance
.. i rmb the time we use to spent little time with each other
u use to chk on me , and anytime u would call
i really appreciate things you do but i couldn't
find the right way to do..
i've been trying to let u see everything i nid, is just so simpple
theres nth other culd replace ,..
it's you..
and now i'm so afraid to face u.
i'm scared of sinking so deeply in llove
neither do i want to taste the bitterness again of losing you..
i know things i said dun mean much to you.





i'm slowly fall in out of love

i <3 you so-

ok so, el endeavors came over to crash,
did abit of H&M project but we talk and relax mostly =]
yvain and joshua stayed over,
fool around, chat on msn and then talk abit hahas.
then when all goin sleeping liao, yvain suddenly want all of us to go out eat
if not, he will poke us T_T..
ok so since he insisted , as a good host, i must accomodate
went mac and sat there like 3 hours..
talk alot bout class and our social life ...
feel bloody tired, went back and follow by hitting the bed..
sorry yq, smoke break too long =]
forgot about you... haha..



Confusse

i <3 you so-

"even i noe tat theres more then 1 fish in the ocean
and i have a fish tank that could fit more then 1 fish"

haiz i really duno how i feel
Fuck

i <3 you so-

http://www.mp3lyrics.org/f4 Been sittin thinkin bout you and I and wondering why were not getting along so fustrated cuz,what we had was a happy home. I don't know what the, situation is but I can tell in the way we kiss we don't talk no more it feels better when I'm alone Sometimes I feel like there's no getting through to you like you don't appreciate all that I do. you gotta show me that you want me to stay don't turn & walk away baby I'm slowly fallin out.. of love with you I don't know what to do, how did we end up here this way what are we gonna do? I'm slowly fallin out.. baby we're trippin on silly things boy I need you to meet me halfway, if you want me to be with you.. I remember when, I'd be with my friends you checked on me and made time to call but how things have changed, now I don't hear from you at all. don't let your pride get in the way, for something we worked so hard, don't throw it away I been tryna make you see everything you need is right here in me baby I'm slowly... don't turn and walk away..... I'm tired of giving my all Slowly fallin How did we end up here this way? I just wana know, what are we gonna do Slowly fallin How did we end up here this way? what are we gonna do

i <3 you so-

Someone's a witch says:
cleon .
Someone's a witch says:
in life , everything's like a game . you cant expect yourself to win every round .
Someone's a witch says:
especially in love . this game is one sucky game that everyone have to been through . not just once , but countless . be it , when youre in a relationship or one-sided love . its still revolving with the word love . you see , in love , its not like any other things like studies or so . how much you sacrificed or put in may not be how much you'll get in return .
Someone's a witch says:
you may forked in all your true feelngs but the other party may only return you 60% of her feelings . its not like some fair game going on .
Someone's a witch says:
they say , the future is in our own hands we ought to fight for it . yes , its true .. only to a certain extent . because sometimes , its just destiny and fate that decides things . we cant have the last say still .
Someone's a witch says:
you fall in love then out of love .. then in love again then out .. its a cycle going on and on . people who got divorced can re-married again .

Someone's a witch says:
people know they'll get hurt but they still decide to LOVE .
Someone's a witch says:
you quesion yourself this k .. " why bother to get yourself in love , when you know its gonna end in the end ? " actually , a start of a new love is a hint of the end of this love . when theres a start of something , you know there'll be an ending to it too .. just that you dont know when's the ending , and hope that what you have will prolong .
Someone's a witch says:
true ?
Someone's a witch says:
im sorry if my words doesnt sound pleasant to your ears , im just trying to let you know how i view love ,
Someone's a witch says:
actually you know all these too .. but the fact that youre just numb by everything happening around you ..
Someone's a witch says:
when one is out of love , one will tend to live their life subconsciously ..
Someone's a witch says:
not perhaps .. remember how you brainwash-ed me the other time ?
Someone's a witch says:
everything is in your brain .. all these big philosophy of out-of-love , its just that you cant make yourself to face all these .. you dont wanna face the truth .
Someone's a witch says:
youre hoping that if this were to be a dream , you'll hope to stay in there forever ..
Someone's a witch says:
cleon .. no matter how much one truly understand all these or you .. there'll be times they cant understand your pain . cause youre the only one feeling this pain now .
Someone's a witch says:
your ethe only one , going through all these shit now . friends can only standby you , hoping that you'll be able to pull yourself up again . they can share the pain with you .. neither can they feel the pain youre going through .
Someone's a witch says:
im sure the pain youre going through aint the pain i've suffered not long .. k&*( isnit that great to make me feel this pain yet . its was a year plus ago that i felt this pain .. from my last ex , b)(*^ ./
Someone's a witch says:
because this pain .. is so strong that , i cant bring myself to forget it ..
Cleon Drinking is NEVER a CRIME Same script, different cast www.themusicianinhispyjamas.blogspot.com says:
neither can i bring myself to
Someone's a witch says:
there'll always be same things in your life , but some are just so special that you wont forget .. be it positive or negative .
Someone's a witch says:
cleon .. like i've said , you dont have to speak anything . cause at this time of time , no words fit in the kinda feelings youre going through , cause youre just literally LOST .
Someone's a witch says:
thats why i say , you must show her that youre actually enjoying life much better without her !
Cleon Drinking is NEVER a CRIME Same script, different cast www.themusicianinhispyjamas.blogspot.com said:
i think u just did a 2000 word essay
Someone's a witch said:
haha . its all worth , for you (:
Someone's a witch said:
even if i were to ad in another 5000 words .
Cleon Drinking is NEVER a CRIME Same script, different cast www.themusicianinhispyjamas.blogspot.com said:
ya with 2000word u almost bought my heart
Someone's a witch said:
hahaha . even better (:
Someone's a witch said:
at least , you wont be missing her .
Cleon Drinking is NEVER a CRIME Same script, different cast www.themusicianinhispyjamas.blogspot.com said:
then i'll suffer pain more pain again






Thx witch..

i <3 you so-

Got change early in the morning at VAin's place to go SEntosa..
so i think we only had like 3 hour of sleep?
his house was really damn far from the train station tats wad i can sae.
met up with donovan and then gerlyn.
so we took the tram, my first time again.
reach like 20 min late , lucky no DP was given, i hope ?
got like 6.5 dp liao. this time die liao, my 3.0 gpa goner liao..
ok yea walk and walk and then joined the class. we played games, have potluk
long swim in the sea (damn happy) and then slack with the group..
alot mentors came, surprising ...
shall up date the photo next time.
hit the showers around 6++ and waited for gerlyn they all,
Cuz we are goin to CAFE DE MAR(dunnohowtospell)
so i think around 13 of us went in , but just as we settle down,
the bouncer came and BOunce US OUT!!!
SHYT
totally a blower, cuz dear angel, mira, ny, donovan,viven still underage, haiz'
o yea forgot to mention, we're gonna celebrate MY INDIE(fiona)'s
BIRTHDAY!!!!!!
so sorry fiona, cafe de dunnowad smash...
so bo pian i have to think of a quick plan, AND IT MUST BE
CONSPIRICY
but abit of thing cork up here and there, cuz the GRoup Too big to manage..
but anyway, had a bottle chivas and 2 balance half bottle chivas, 2 jug chivas COKE
2 jugg beer, think i finish most of it.
we played the poker game which was played in gerlyn house, ok no detail shall be given
then i went over the bar to sit down, talk to cristal and chanel, and petter
just some things kept in me..



SOMETHING HAPPENED HERE


ok so lot of them drunk and then vomited..
tats like so little please.. it's not even 1/3 of wad i usuall drink =]
then they all tot i drunk LOLSs
o then we parted and few of us went vivien's place to crash
i took a shower and immediataly hit the bed and BOOM
next thing i noe is BREAKfast is serve =]
lucky daddy near by sengkang, fetch me home .. POWER
misses my bed and my shower and of cuz my tolietbowl..
not forgetting dear smelly lucky and the oily floor EEEE
ok before i could go rest, gonna go meet up with gerlyn to do econs =]



thx guys for your concern, i noe i worried all of u.. DAMN paisie ... shhhhhhhhhHHHH!!!!

i <3 you so-

Happy birthday PAm!!!!

Hahas went to play with Yvain,HuiYui,Joshua,Pam, and some pam's friends =]
ORdered abottle champaign and a total of 6 jug or others house Drink spend 20 DOLLAR!!!
ROarss, luckly daddy gave me 50$ to spend, but inthend i'm still left with only 10 DOllar =[
WOw pam got very cute friend =] yuan qing =]
too bad she's attach... =[
dance and bozzeeee like crazy
now i'm at yvain house stay over,
o ya btw i went PLAY!!!
it's a gay PUb
LOLs
new experience
but i think it's better then zouk or any other straight club, cuz it's so peacefull there
Awww the BOOzzeee is acting again, i'm off...
TML SENTOSA!!!! class outing...

i <3 you so-

YEs YES YESYESYESYESYEYS

term 1 econ 43/60
term 2 econ 48/60
YESYESYES
MONEY!!!! coming
cuz small aunt gonna use money motivate me to study =]
o my mum also =]
wan a new bag, perhaps 1 from subcrew
and i so need new pants and shorts.
thx for the encouragement ppl

i <3 you so-

Finally Tourism project OVER ..
saddly we'r not the best =[
ok gotta i'm damn jealous,
but way to go team humble one
had hot spot just now with my sharkies
theres so much to learn from one another..
good job gerlyn, tina,donovan,joshua and thx for side tracking us ANGEL!!!

ok next, Economics =]
my favorite hehe..
hope my class can really grow up and quiet DOWN ass hole

lonely 17/11/08

i <3 you so-

So woke up from boozzeee like around 11 plus??
cuz MR clark father kpkb him.
O ya he stayed over cuz he was too HIGh??
yea cab back from conspiracy like $30 plus plus,
nb.
ok so mr clark wake me up to open the fucking door for him,
nb.
then went back to sleep again.
so the whole thing was because of Tourism geog
gonna meet up with the Sharkies at 1pm sharp.
thus being very pro active,
around 5am msged 2 very imp person for wake up call
thanks Angel & joshua.
around 12.15 Angel called,
ask her to call me back at 12.30
she nagged abit then hung up.
shall not sae wad i was doing during tat period of time
she called again at 12.30
i ask her call me back at 12.45
LOLsss
she almost spoil my ear drum.
then we chat awhile before i'm done with wad i'm doin

ok took a shower and then sat infront of the com
it's 1pm.. the meeting time
damnn.
of cuz
i'm always late..
got dressed up and bused down to compose point ?
i'm considered early
reach abt 3pm =]
then gerlyn and angel came
then tina =]
project till 9 plus, seriouly i'm just playing props today
i didt do anything, just slack..
after tat went star buck cuz currysan was closing..
project was almost done thx to hard working tina and gerlyn =]
went out and smoke with angel(she dont smoke)
chat alot didt notice the clock ticking
it was like so long since i could talk to someone like tat
thx Angel again =]
ok tired liao.. shall blog another day..
need rush project AGAIN!!!



Lovess project ..

i <3 you so-

A bottle Chivas
another bottle Martel
and a one man down
6 sexy waitress
700 dollar
8 super freaky people
9 jug beer
what more do i have to say
Fuck School
sonfabytch

i <3 you so-

Dont read !!!!
A Parent's Guide to
Satanic Cult Ritual Abuse


Your child comes home late every night. It has developed a curious habit lately of listening to heavy metal rock music. It no longer pays you any attention. It seems preoccupied. It spends more and more of its time away from home. You suspect that your child is experimenting with drugs. What can a parent do?

Like millions of other American youths, your child has most likely joined a Satanic cult. Though you may be shocked when you realize the truth, it is important to bear in mind that all teenagers at one time or another join cults. It's something that most parents don't want to face or deal with, so they try to ignore it. Discussing Devil worship with your child can be almost as awkward as trying to talk about sex.

Now that you run the risk of losing your child to a cult, how do you go about turning its interest back to the home and family? The answer is simple. Children tend to look elsewhere for things that are lacking in their own lives. If your youngster is attending rituals with strangers, it is because you are not providing what your child needs.

Satanic cult ritual abuse should begin at home, with the family. While you and your spouse have been secretly worshipping Satan in the privacy of your bedroom, you should have been sharing this intimate ritual with your kids. Children want and need to be involved in abusive rituals to create bonds between other family members that are strong and lasting.

Now that you know what you need to do, where do you begin?

WHY FORM A CULT?

By and large, the main reason your children should worship the Devil is to help them develop Multiple Personality Disorders (MPDs). These are very special traits that most children need and most likely will not receive in school. The more you tear away at a child's self image, the stronger it becomes. A child can only develop healthy MPDs after experiencing years and years of cult abuse. Remember the first time your parents abused you during a Satanic ritual? Remember how good it felt?

THE DISCUSSION

Choosing the right time to speak with your child is very important. Probably the best time for a discussion is when your child urgently needs to use the restroom. Sit it down and tell it that it can take care of its needs after you have a little chat. Abruptly slap the child in the face and tell it that it will not be allowed to leave the house at night anymore. If the child puts up a fight, slap it harder. Do not allow the child to go to the bathroom until it agrees to your demands.

When it returns from the restroom, tell your child that it will be required to attend Satanic cult rituals with the family beginning the following day after supper. Slap the child again and send it to bed.

WHY PRACTICE RITUALS?

Torture and pain release energy into the family circle and increase the spiritual power of the individuals. Rituals must be precisely completed as prescribed to prevent the wrath of Satan and his demons. The main reason for participation in rituals is to destroy self esteem and self confidence. Therefore, if anyone complains that the rituals make them feel bad, tell them that this is exactly how they are supposed to feel.

Ritual #1: Testing the Feces

On the first night, the family sits in a circle around a fire in the living room. One by one, each person stands and defecates onto a paper plate. After each family member has done their "duty", the plates are passed around the circle for inspection and testing. Testing is accomplished by placing a tablespoon of the feces on the back of the tongue. Explain to your children that they are eating pieces of Satan's body and that this is an honor. Should they be hesitant to taste the "food", threaten them by telling them they will be forced to go to church the following Sunday. This will prompt most children to immediately obey any command.

During this ritual, the family should openly discuss their feelings. Ask your children to express any visual imagery they might be experiencing. After all the feces have been tested, throw them on the fire. The family should then say goodnight and retire for the evening.

Ritual #2: Mommy Gets Tubed

Begin the second night's ritual by saying a short prayer to the Devil. The mother's body is then suspended naked from the ceiling. The other family members take turns inserting tubes into the ears, nose, mouth, barnhole, and mystery hole of the mother. Once the tubes have been inserted, each person takes turns pouring liquids into the tubes to see what effect they have. Try using bleach, paint remover, insecticide, weed killer, or battery acid. Be creative. Mom will be sure to let you know how she feels by making funny faces and by creating some intriguing sounds.

After she has been sufficiently tested, the remaining family members take turns lashing at Mom with a metal rod. After she has been properly beaten, put Mom to bed so that she may recover for the next night's ritual.

Ritual #3: Sacrificing the Dog

As you and your children should already know, any dog that is truly loyal is a dog that must be sacrificed. Begin by petting your furry trusting friend and giving him some treats. Then have the youngest family member nail the dog's feet to the floor. Do not bind the snout of the dog. The dog must be allowed to sing about its pain. Each person then takes part in removing the dog's skin, taking care not to burst any main arteries. The dog must remain alive during the skinning. Once the dog has been skinned, twenty thick needles are inserted through its muscle tissue. The dog's urgent, strained cries are heavenly music to Satan's delicate ears.

After it has been tortured for a minimum of 90 minutes, throw the dog on the fire and do some serious chanting. When it stops breathing, the ritual is over. The family can now begin discussing what kind of dog they want next.

Ritual #4: Sister Has a "Baby"

Your daughter has made a serious error in judgment and tonight she must pay. She allowed herself to be impregnated by a black man, and this mistake must now be corrected. Have your son tie his sister securely to the dining room table with heavy rope. Each family member then lights a black candle and drips hot wax onto the daughter's breasts and eyelids. In this particular ritual, the daughter's mouth should be taped so that she cannot make any sound. This is her punishment for making such a bad mistake. The mock abortion then begins.

The mother lifts the daughter's skirt and pretends to remove a large lizard from her barnhole. As soon as the lizard has been "born", it is sliced in half and eaten. Next, the father pulls slugs from underneath the daughter's dress as if she were "having" them. The son then pulls live pig embryos from the daughter's mystery hole that were inserted prior to the ritual. If all goes according to plan, the embryos will now float in a circle over the daughter's head chanting familiar nursery rhymes.

All the family members then ridicule the daughter by telling her how ugly her barnhole is. They take turns making lacerations in her abdomen. The daughter is then untied and told that she is now healthy.

Ritual #5: Like Father, Like Son

Women can never worship Satan properly until they understand what makes men tick. This ritual begins with the mother and daughter showing homosexual porn videos to the father and brother. As the men become aroused, they remove their clothing and stand naked before the women. The father and son then perform mutually until they reach orgasm. As their seed falls to the floor, the women must catch it in little glass vials.

The vials are then heated over an open fire. As soon as the semen boils, LSD is added to it. Each family member then ingests a small amount of the mixture. Once everyone is tripping, the family takes turns branding each other with a hot cattle prod. Remember...any pain that may be experienced is imaginary. The ritual ends with the family playing "Jingle Jangle" on kazoos.

Ritual #6: Beating the Hell Out of Each Other

The sixth ritual is relatively simple. After donning black gowns and meditating for a few moments, the family simply tries to kill one another. In this ritual, anything is game. Individuals may use knives, sticks, bats, or anything they deem will be useful to them to adequately injure other family members. The only stipulation during this ritual is that each individual must yell "Satan is Lord" prior to delivering any cuts or blows.

After everyone has been cut up and beaten, any and all blood must be drained into a large aluminum bucket. Once the bucket is full, each person urinates into it. Thus endeth ritual number six.

Ritual #7: Having Friends Over to Play

At this point, your children may complain that they are never allowed to have friends over. This is a good time to tell them that they can have a female friend over to join in tonight's ritual. Have your children tell the friend to arrive after dark. Prior to the girl's arrival, a small isolation pit should be dug in the back yard, out of the sight of neighbors. When the friend arrives, her tongue is severed and she is thrown into the pit. This ritual is ongoing, as the girl is slowly and methodically starved and tortured. Urine and blood saved from the prior ritual should be lightly sprinkled onto the girl each morning. All family members are invited to creatively abuse the girl at least once daily. Some families claim that after they get used to the new pet, they never even want another dog.

DETERMINING THE RESULTS

If you've performed these rituals correctly, your child will be permanently affected. The things your child should have learned are: (1) obedience, (2) the importance of listening to others, (3) respect for parents, (4) how to play a kazoo, and (5) the difference between right and wrong.

The next time you think about going out for dinner or to a movie, perform a Satanic ritual instead. You'll not only save your family money...you'll save their souls as well.

i <3 you so-

I know he's leaving me for youWho said that, who told youThat is trueWhat is he telling youCould it be the same things that he told meHe told me that he loved me(I heard that)he told me I was beautifulhow did you know, how did you knowcause I played the scene beforeCHORUSThis is a retake of my lifeI was his star for many nightsNow the roles have changedAnd you're the leading lady in his lifeLights, camera, now you're onJust remember you've been warnedEnjoy it now, cause it won't lastSame script, different castWhat you're saying could be trueBut how can I take advice from youI'm not hatingBut I wish the one before meWould have warned me tooDon't say no more (lalalala)Uncover your ears girlI'm not listening (lalalala)But I know you hear meMaybe my reasons are wrongBut I know that you believe meCHORUSIt's your fault you didn't love him enoughThat's the problemI loved him too muchAnd when you love himHe becomes unattracted to you Oh no, he's changed and I'll prove you wrongSo go away, leave us the hell aloneHe loves me (he'll hurt you)He'll stay with me (he'll leave you)For sure, for sureCHORUSThis is a retake of your lifeYou were his star for many nightsBut now the roles have changedI'm the leading lady in his lifeLights, camera now you're onJust remember you've been warnedEnjoy it now, cause this will lastI'm his future, you're his pastThis is a retake of my life (of your life)I was his star for many nightsNow the roles have changed And you're the leading lady in his lifeLights, camera now you're onJust remember you've been warnedEnjoy it now (just watch us now)Cause it won't last (I know it will last)Same script, different cast


it's not age gap problem, it's the stages are different. i'm heading adult stage and i nid alot to learn towards my goal, including my studies.you are in your teenage hood, which is not long ago. and u just start to your enjoy your teenage life, which i experience before, i understand how u feel, as it's quite difficult and confussing, becusm u wan your freedom, and yet you are not allow.. your freetime dun allows you to do wad u wan, thus you have plenty of free time for nth. as for me, i nid to to search for free time... what i taught before it's just 1% of your lifetime, maybe lesser.. even myself, i'm trying hard to learn more. even an adult friend of mine sae i have at least 95% more to learn(not including enjoying life life)during my tudies, i learn alot, how to be nice to ppl hahahahaha...and how to understand ppl, including profleing them, noeing their needs and want..thoughts.
hope the song explain how i feel
no, felt

i <3 you so-

Was killed on november 0908
bye



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